It’s Just Justin

Déjà Vu

Such is my life. I finally start to have feelings for someone, we start to become close and what does he do? He gets a new “boyfriend”. What’s worse is he has my same name and is two years younger and he brings him to my house to my party right infront of me.

Why do people I want to try and be with always want to try and make me so sad? Moreover, why are they always so successful?

All and all I had a nice night. There were not too many people over here as the main party was next door, and the snow-ball fight was a lot of fun, but in the back of my mind I felt just as I had when I was replaced by another man when dating Geoff. I do not like the way I am treated and I do not living a life with such abandon.

“Pretty things, oh why do I like pretty things”

They only hurt you. The more beautiful they are, the more pain they inflict.

Anyways, I am off to go wedding ring shopping, hopefully it will be successful. First though, I must shower and ready myself for a very important day, the day that I start turning the wheels again.

Later all.

Remind Me of…

So I had a dream I said I would write about… let me just jot some things down quickly so i can recall it later.

police officer
speeding
people
girl
sweat
condom(!)
beautiful eyes
fun
hot
grass
summer
steamy

Peanut Butter Cups Have Chocolate…

Bah, so my day is already crazy.

I woke up at 9:00 but went back to bed and had a most amazing dream. To that in a minute. I woke up again at 10:33 which had me running a bit later. I got to class about 5 minutes early, so that was all good. We did group work, however my group sucked so I, as usual, had to do all of the work.

Then to my apartment because I forgot a book and my cellphone. I pick up my phone and get a message from a brother telling me that I forgot to turn in some papers… SHIT! So instead of doing homework and getting lunch, I have to fix the situation.

I ride my bike to Brady, make copies of the appropriate papers and turn them into Greek Life and everything is fine. But then I go to the bookstore (I have lost my French workbook) to purchase a book, again, and they are sold out. So I will not be able to do homework.

I go to my French teacher’s office and leave her a note explaining why I will not be turning in my homework and then back to Brady to get lunch. I bump into Jacqwi who gives me a hard time because I don’t hang out with her or with Erin anymore.

First off, I never really hung out with them. Secondly, they typically only “hang out” with me when they need computer help. Thirdly… don’t even get me started.

I then rush to the coffee house in Brady to get something to drink with sugar in it, I am running really low on sugar since I had to skip breakfast and lunch, and it is really catching up with me. I am shakey, sweaty, pale and freaking out. I order a Peanut Butter Cup Shake, a mistake I realize. The first shake, yes, there was more than one, started out nice, chocolate ice cream, peanut butter, ice and milk, he blends it up, for a little too long… and then tries to pour it.

Well, apparently he put too much ice and not enough milk or ice cream for the shake would not pour out. So he adds milk and then it is too milky, so he adds ice cream and it is this cyle for way too long. Finally it is finished and he is placing the lid onto the cup. Why he put all of his weight into it, I do not know.

He squished the cup which exploded onto him and the counter and just about everywhere, luckily I was an exception. It was followed by a loud “SHIT” from the employee. He then has a girl make one for me as he cleans up.

She puts vanilla ice cream instead of chocolate into the shake. I tell her she is doing it wrong and she says that she is not. So once it is finished, it is no longer a dark brown milkshake, it is a pale, tan milkshakes. It tastes like cardboard, but I really have no choice. If I don’t eat at least a little of it, I will get even more sick.

I swallow the liquified cardboard and rush to my class. Luckily my girl from my last political science class always sits next to me. She is a doll, I absolutely love her. Very pretty, quite young and really going places.

Anyways, I am in class so perhaps I should pay more attention to the lecture. We have a test next Friday which I am really not ready for. Anywho, I love you all, even you.

-justin

I’ve Got Two Piña Coladas, One for Each Hand…

My mother used to love that song by Garth Brooks. It has more meaning for tonight as well.

After The OC gathering, which I cleaned and studied through, Jon came over and hung out with Jenny and I kinda did some work but I was of course distracted.

Around 9:00 Patrick came over and we made our plans for the night. We decided to try something new, not that we were tired of Sunshine. That will never happen hehe. But Piña Coladas sounded nice so we went off to the grocery store for the ingredients which was quite an adventure in its self.

On the way home, Patrick and I decided that tomorrow, errr, today, we would go out and look at wedding rings. We are going to work on an article together where we play a gay couple who is getting married. We are going to head to several jewelry stores and rate their service. I am excited to see how different people act infront of us as we are not the typical couple getting wedding bands.

It reminds me of when Geoff and I got our rings. I thought it symbolized our eternal love for each other. I guess I was wrong. I still have my ring, I would like to think he does but I am afraid to know that he lost it, destroyed it, threw it out, gave it away… whatever. I really could not take knowing that he did anything to his ring.

Anyways, it will be a fun project for sure.

So we made Piña Coladas for ourselves and Jim and Ryan and eventually one for Jenny. They were quite good! A little cold of course so I could not drink mine at a normal pace, I kept getting ice headaches.

So after watching half of Moonstruck and half of West Side Story, we headed out to the diner. As we walked in there I started getting looks from this semi-gorgeous guy, looked straight but he came up and talked to me so I guess perhaps not haha. Then right before we left a real deal gorgeous guy sat in the table across from us with his three girls. He was just so pretty, though not as pretty as Mark hehe.

Anyways, he got my number, I was quite a nervous little boy. We then went to my car, drove around a bit singing Moulin Rouge and just having a wonderful time. Dropped Jim and Ryan off back at my place while Patrick and I went to Joe’s to talk to them and just hang for a bit. I had a nice time over there, they are such wonderful breeders hehe.

Back to my apartment, Patrick and I watched the rest of West Side story, well up till Tony’s death, with the company of Jim and Ryan towards the end. I drove them back to their homes and came back to mine, where I am now typing this post to all those who read. Well all those who read my journal.

I am really loving the independence I now have, but I still miss, more than anything else, being loved by the one I love and being able to hold them as they fall asleep… I miss that greatly.

I should head to bed though, I have class in the morning and homework still left to do. Much love.

-justin

Quote of the Moment

“Life, you lose, of course; what matters is how you conduct yourself while you are being destroyed.”

-Hemingway

Smashing Good Time

So last night was a good time. I had a bunch of homework to do and got a good bit done and then hung out with the girls. Aj came over and the girls made Sushi and I made Pad Thai, it was all really nice.

We watched American Idol which was fabulous and then moved onto The Simple Life. Aj left shortly after that and just minutes later Patrick Buckalew came over. haha, it was so much fun!

We all went to Sparky’s and got ice cream. I did not get sick like every other time I have tried to have ice cream since the breakup. It I guess is a sign that I am getting over Geoff, let’s just hope I can keep it up. I think staying away from him, as hard as it is to do, deals a big part of me being able to move on.

As we were walking from Sparky’s, Patrick and I starting singing the Jet song from West Side Story.

When you’re a Jet,
You’re a Jet all the way
From your first cigarette
To your last dyin’ day.

We had the finger snapping down and I did the run-against-the-wall-and-jump-to-a-spin-off-annnnnnd-pose. It was perfect. I can’t believe how awesome we looked haha, the five of us doing West Side Story down an alley off 9th Street. It was such a blast.

We went from the alley to South Side Liquors and picked up a little Malibu Mango and some really interesting wine which we will cork-pop hopefully tonight.

I made Patrick and myself some Sunshine and about half-way through our drinks it was brought to our attention that two of my roommates wanted new “toys”, haha! So we went to the Old Un and we each got a new toy! We all have matching toys too, how great is that?

We ordered Gumby’s on the way to the Old Un and it arrived just as we got home. It had been quite a while since I had Gumby’s, yum! We started writing our own version of West Side Story which is going to be a really long process but it is fun.

Anyways, Patrick went home around 1:00 and I talked to Jim on the phone till about 2:00 and then talked to Jenny till around 3:00.

Last night was just a total win, though I did not finish my French homework, I should have no problem getting it done during lunch.

Anyways, back to class, have a nice day. See you soon.

-justin

Did you say craft?

So I have been a in artsy, craftsy mood recently. Keeps me occupied so my mind does not wander during study breaks and what not.

You have already seen the brothel sign but now you can see it in its last of three stages of being complete. We still need to get the magnets for the back.

Here we have glued and nailed each of the letters to the board. The board was originally just a plain pine color. We stained it and then used my torch to burn it. It caught on fire and made the smoke alarm go off, but it was all good. We had some really awesome ideas when we started going, one right after the other.

Jim came up with a way to put my idea of our establishment date onto the sign. It was quickly agreed that burning into the wood likely would be the coolest option so with Jim’s ingenious brand-of-coat-hangers, we quickly were able to spell out our message.

Some might wonder why it says Est. 2003 since we moved in April 1, 2004. We decided that since we all met in 2003, and the apartment was being discussed then and mostly since I accidentally put 2003, it would be just fine and proper. hahaha!

Jim and I put polyeurathane on the sign to protect it from the elements. It is going to be hung on the door during parties using magnets from old speakers (they are super powerful) attached to the sign with epoxy. Our first party with the sign is coming up very quickly so hopefully Jim and I will find a good speaker to kill today on our adventures in the Salvation Army!

This afternoon I got down to business and mailed out a few gifts to my mother, three movies, a book and a t-shirt. I also sent my brother a case for his laptop and a pair of shorts he is in love with.

The book I sent my mother was Where the Wild Things Live, a book she used to read to me as a child to scare the shit outta me. I first wrapped it in plastic and then in copper wire…

After that, I put the book inside of an envelope and glued and tacked it shut. I then put a warning label on it, yeah not as classy as I had hoped but my printer is outta ink, and put some “specimen” gloves (enclosed in it’s own plastic bag) on the envelope and wrapped it in more copper wire. Finally, I got my torch and burned the edges of the envelope.

I put each gift, the T-Shirt was a Gnome shirt…

…inside joke with my mother, in its own FedEX container and then put all three FedEX containers together and shipped it off. It should get to Tulsa around the same time she gets back into town. It was really fun to make hehe.

The Brothel

So the girls and I… which really equates to myself, Jim and Jenny, created this wonderful sign for our apartment. It was first called the Brothel by Meg and we just decided to run with it!

Here is a picture right before we finished it so bear with me until I am able to upload the newest pictures.

The sign is going to be hung onto our door during parties and whatnot. We already have the red lights up. haha. Our place has become quite the social hub!

There are parties here just all the time, even just like Orange Country parties and movie nights. I love having friends again, they are pretty much all that keep me from going completely crazy these days.

Jim and I are going to get some heavy-duty magnets and epoxy after class to attach the sign to the metal door.

Catch you later!

Trent’s Birthday Party

So Trent had his 19th… or was it his 20th?… birthday party at our house. It was a blast. There was a butt load of people there but they all pretty much behaved themselves. All but one actually. This one guy punched me in the kidneys because I was taking pictures. He was like, “What the fuck are you taking pictures for?!”… I told him it was my apartment and my friend’s birthday and that it was my right to take pictures.

Trent found out that this guy was a bastard to me and, well he took care of business. hehe.

Here are some pictures I was able to take, before getting punched.

This is our “Hall of Fame” which has grown quite a bit. We have recently changed its lighting and arrangement, hopefully I can get pics of that up too. w00t. Our place is really coming around.

Creme Brulee, Hey Hey Hey!

So I made Creme Brulee for 10 people! It was a blast. I got the creme brulee kit from my mother for christmas and was really wanting to make some ever since, finally I had the ingredients and the people to try it out on. It turned out fabulous!

John was curious about the flame, but most curious in where I had hidden the French custards. He searched the apartment but luckily never found them… Look in the refrigerator next time buddy!

Jim and Ryan were the first to have some of the fired dessert. Everyone had to share a serving as I just did not have enough containers for all of the creme brulee. I am going to head out to Pier One sometime soon and buy some more.

Apparently Jenny really liked it. Patrick of course found it “highly classy and terribly delicious”. He cracks me up, quite glad to have him more in my life right now. His no bullshit attitude and his ability to have fun in nearly any situation is fantastic. Also love that I can talk Mizzou politics with him. Fantastic!

Once Jon finally received his cup, he was speechless. Actually he was just trying to block the camera. Oh well.

Ok, so Jim and Ryan are just too cute! It makes me both extremely happy and slightly sad seeing them together. I am so jealous of what they have. The greatest thing you’ll ever know is to love and be loved in return. The worst is to love and not be loved in return, I certainly know how that is.

The following are just two group shots we did after eating our dessert and having a few drinks. hehe. At this point I think we had finished off all of the Sunshine, which should be a sin!