Dr.’s Orders

Expecting, or rather hoping, to have some people over tonight didn’t exactly pan out for me. With Jim and David out of town and the apartment sparkling clean, I was excited at the idea that I would get to do a little entertaining. Of course, this didn’t happen, so instead I went to Best Buy and bought a CD/DVD from BT entitled This Binary Universe. Props to Dawn and Drew for bringing BT back into my life.
Describing This Binary Universe is like describing a forest; cut with streams and ridges, entangled in English Ivy battling the underbrush to find light, forgetting the song birds, the small yellow fish swimming up the the waters’ current, the amber sap leaking from evergreens glowing with each catch of the sun rays… This Binary Universe is essentially a CD and DVD with matching soundtracks, the DVD puts fascinating art to the movements of the music. Catch a preview, below.

[quicktime width=”480″ height=”285″]http://itsjustjustin.com/wp-content/wordpress/video/The%20Binary%20Universe.mov[/quicktime]

The CD/DVD combo is only $13.99 at Best Buy, an incredible steal. I would have paid $30 for this without batting an eye.

The reason I am writing this post, the reason why I am not asleep right now, are one and the same. I hopped into bed around 9:00, I open Starbucks tomorrow, yet found myself unable to quiet my mind.

The past few days have been socially wonderful. Hanging out with Geoffrey like old times is exciting and glorious even. The other night with John, Matt, Matt, Mark Geoff and Brad really made me feel that I could have a life here, without feeling alone.

That was until, I suppose, I got into bed alone. My apartment is quiet with no heat running, televisions off and the stereo powered down from a night of pulse pounding pseudosymphonicelectronica. Now, all I hear is a great void, my mind tries so hard to find the missing notes or a creaking floor board from upstairs, anything to prove I am not alone.

I guess I’m stressing over classes, going home for Thanksgiving, grades (again, another way of saying classes), registering for classes… I feel I am on the verge of possibly disappointing a lot of people. No idea how that would be but…

I am in bed, struggling to fall asleep. Geoff called me and suggested that I write for a bit, see if that helps me fall asleep. Landon said that sleep works things out and that tomorrow will be more beautiful. I am not sure he understands me anymore. How could he though, he has so many things on his mind these days, I shouldn’t be very high on the list.

I suppose I am worrying much too much about the future and oddly enough, about the past. Is that really so odd though?

Seth has been popping into my mind as of recent. I am not sure why. Clearly I miss him, I miss all things in California. What I would give to be back there.

Maybe if I try really hard, if I push everything out, I’ll fall asleep. I need the sleep. Tomorrow I work for eight hours at Starbucks and then I pack up for Texas.

Thanks Geoffrey for the phone call. I hope all your advices work for me tonight.

Much love to you all,


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