Lest you be vulnerable

I need my “other” to be as vulnerable as I. I have deep, painful secrets. I have images in my mind that would make many people curl up and wish they were dead, but they are images of my reality, past and present and the debatable future. My life is nothing compared the the greater population.

There are secrets you learn about me only after really knowing me, and I mean really knowing me. Jenny, Jim, Landon, Geoff; the only people that really know some of my darker demons, and there are more that even these few don’t know. Landon of course knows me better than anyone else. Well, that might be hard to swallow for a few of my readers but there is an aspect of Landon that people, relatives, friends otherwise cannot connect.

I opened up to Dave faster than anyone else, why? I can’t really explain. I think his mistique brought it out of me.

I need someone with as many secrets to open up to me, to exchange these secrets is to deepen the connection.

Geoff and I exchanged some secrets, I obviously won’t go into them, their in our “vault”. It was powerful, a real part of why we were so in love and why we worked so well together. Some secrets, those that were’nt shared, I think are a huge reason, the reason, we really ended. For whatever reason we closed up, we ended the openess.

I can’t wait to share things with him… some day I hope we can open up that channel.

Landon and I recently let the flood gates fly wide open. And what a difference it made.

As I type this, Jim and I are talking about our recent decline in such and how we plan to do it more often…

I miss Jenny.

2 thoughts on “Lest you be vulnerable

  1. ahh I miss you too! I am so sad that you are not coming to Columbia. I was getting very excited about seeing you for the first time in 4 months…can you believe that it has been so long??? Maybe I will go out to San Francisco over winter break or something. You know I have a free plane ticket to use….I know this is a long comment but I wanted to let you know that I love you so much!!!! Everyone says Hi and they are sad that you are not going to be here this weekend…..~~~kisses~~

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