I’m Nacho Friend!

This video was shared on Facebook by my friend Sam. It illustrates almost exactly what happens to me when I have a bit too much. One of my friend’s, named Aaron (I have fifteen), has a recording of such a moment. If it ever makes it to the Internet I’ll have 14 friends named Aaron. Of course if he illustrates it like this, fair game.

“Two Chips” / An Animated Short from Adam Patch on Vimeo.

Here’s what Gawker had to say about it.

Guy’s Drunk Wife Tells Him a Lame Joke; He Animates the Result

Remember the other day when you were saying how much you loved the sketch series “Drunk History” but that you wished how instead of history it was a corny joke about tortilla chips that Morgan Patch told her husband Adam while sauced off her ass on a bottle of wine, which he then turned into an animated short?

I wish I had his skills and her jokes. You’re welcome and Happy Friday!

A Bad Lip Reading of the First 2012 Presidential Debate

Big thumbs up to Thomas Sanchez who posted this on Facebook earlier today. It is, by far, the funniest thing I have seen all week. And believe it or not, Denver debate moderator Jim Lehrer seems more in control of the debate in this parody video than in real life. Ok so that isn’t so hard to believe. Sadly President Obama still loses this debate, bad lip reading or not.

This was created by the brilliant people over at Bad Lip Reading. Can’t wait to see what they do with the next debate. Hopefully President Obama will bring his A Game instead of whatever that was he brought to Denver. Oh and, you’re welcome.

Let’s Enhance

One of my biggest pet peeves on television shows, especially crime shows, is how obnoxious their computers and technology are.  Every bleep, blap and bloop with every click, tap and scroll really annoys the heck out of me.  So when I saw this compilation of obnoxious photo-enhance scenes from popular television shows and movies, I knew I had to share it.  Going through YouTube I discovered a plethora of these compilations, totally check them out.  Woot has a great selection here.

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Feast of Fools

Feast of Fools logoImage via Wikipedia

So, my friend Nick Starr had the chance to be the guest of honor on the Feast of Fools Podcast last week.

In the episode, they took a question from me which was, “Hey Nick, what would we be doing had I been able to go with you?”

Well they quoted me differently making it sound like I was going to sleep with Nick, maybe they read it wrong.  They also took out words that made me sound like I couldn’t write proper English.  Hmmm.  It’s ok, I figure they just got it wrong since it was live.

But what actually bothers me is the part where Nick says I’m hot.  Well that didn’t bother me haha, it was when they went to my site and right off the bat said I didn’t have any pictures.  (The second post is a picture of me…)

When they found the picture Fausto or Marc stated that yes, I was hot but also that my picture was heavily airbrushed.

Listen to it here

And now, here’s the picture. Click it to go to the larger sized version at PiczarPhoto.com

Not Airbrushed

Argh!  Why does that bother me so much?  I didn’t airbrush myself.  Oh well. Mostly it was all compliments and I absolutely adore Marc and Fausto’s show, it’s been on my podcast playlist since Day 1.

Still, I wouldn’t argue with some of you guys letting ’em know that the reason I don’t have lines and wrinkles in that picture is because I don’t have lines and wrinkles!  I’m barely 24 years old! You can find the post specific to this episode here.

In the end though, it’s great to be heard on a podcast you love so much. I’m not on Dawn and Drew at all anymore, need to catch up with them… And anything with Keith and the Girl has been on the forms or email but never on the actual cast.

It’s a great feeling to have people talk about you, even with some of the bad parts (misquote/airbrush). But to be called sexy and hot for the whole world to hear, that’s empowering haha.

I want to thank Nick for being so nice and saying such wonderful things about me on the show, and for keeping it down to about two minutes, any more and who knows what might have been said tee hee.

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The State of Television

We have all at one point been obsessed with a reality show, whether it was Real World (back when it was awesome), Survivor or Who Wants to Marry a  Millionaire.

Back in the late 1990’s and early 2000’s I really loved watching MTV for two reasons.  First, Undressed which pretty much was my first porn though officially it was a…

sexy, late night soap opera Undressed, which gave viewers a peek behind closed doors at the intricacies of modern relationships. Each episode featured three different fictional stories and followed various characters to see what happened during their most intimate moments. No subject was too taboo.

No kidding.  They did everything and back then that was a big deal.  They took mixed race relationships, gay, lesbian, step siblings… in school, in the dorms, in the bedroom, in the car… they had sex everywhere and it was HOT.  I really can’t beleive it was on basic cable.  But boy howdy did I love it.

Now we have Gossip Girl, the new MTV Undressed but this time with lots of high style and much better dialog (well, it’s all relative).  While Undressed was made to appear like a reality show/soap opera, Gossip Girl is clearly a drama, but it’s got all the sex.

In fact, they are sexing themselves up, actually advertising the fact that many family groups are greatly opposed to their show.

I have to admit, I’m a huge fan of Gossip Girl, it’s so scandalous and sexy, how could you possibly say no?

The other night I was hanging with Ryan at his base watching television and eating some dinner I made for him at home.  We turned on the television to see what was on.

Disturbing things were seen.  First up, and most disturbing, The Baby Borrowers.

Yes… a show where people borrow other people’s babies and kids.  It is called a social experiment.  So was Dr. Philip Zimbardo‘s Stanford Prison Experiment and I’m sure we all know how that ended…  What the hell is wrong with us?  Borrowing babies?  I mean, come one, this isn’t an opium den in China!  Not yet at least.

Even more disturbing, on at the same time on another network, Super Nanny.  On this episode, there was a family of five; the oldest daughter was a goth punk girl who swore and screamed evil at her father, the middle child was wheelchair bound and greatly ignored by her father and the youngest was one hell of a bratty little bitch girl who beat the shit out the mom both physically and emotionally.  It was one hot mess and of course, put on television for all to see.

Why do people do that kind of shit?  Show off how they have been terrible parents, the most important job a parent can have.  That’s like having a show called, “Watch Me Suck at Everything I Do”… oh wait, that’ why we have VH1’s Celebreality.

We still have Jerry Springer too.  Last night I hung out with Jeremy, we watched Resident Evil (which I give a C-) followed by whatever was on TV at 1:00am.  Hillybilly fighting was on…  Well at least you can say he’s consistent.  WTF is wrong with these people?

And while I might be confused, upset, disturbed or down right pissed off at the quality of television these days, there are a few gems.  Damages is incredible, Saving Grace is rich with raw sex and emotion, Mad Men is terribly entertaining and shows like Burn Notice and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia make the summer television season quite bearable.

Oh yeah, and then we have the hilarity that is true reality television.  It is hard to find these diamonds in the rough where someone isn’t putting on an act, when they really are who you see on the screen.  Here’s a great example.  Don’t worry, it’s ok to laugh, she signed some sort of “I’m a fucking weirdo, jackass, dumbshit or otherwise” agreement.

[flv:Big_Brother.flv 500 281]

Ahhhh, crazy Asian girls and their love for COOOOOOKIEEEEEEESSSS!

This post dedicated to my good friend, Jonathan.  One of the best guides to today’s entertainment.

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